Over the course
of this semester I have built several conclusions about myself that I wouldn’t
have come to without this class and the concept behind it. Coming into this
class I was eager to discover where my ‘gifted’ abilities laid. In the
beginning, I was extremely diligent in researching my independent study, and
constantly questioning what more I could do. In this aspect, I believe I had a
great deal of success researching and putting forth a genuine effort toward my
topic. With my original topic choice, I chose something (Bharatanatyam) that I
held close to my heart and was truly (and still am) passionate about. However,
I ran into the issue of having not enough to ‘research’ for this topic, and
additionally felt I spent so much time working on it outside of school, I
couldn’t really research about it for an hour five days a week. On this point,
I believe that I fell through the cracks bit and gave up a little sooner than I
could have, still in the time I had this topic I did give it 110%.
With my original
topic scrapped, this lead to me to switching my original topic to something in
a similar realm (Ethic and Cultural Art). I started strong in this topic, with
a good amount of research books, and blog posts to accompany it. I again ran
into the problem of me not truly enjoying researching this topic, I found it
slightly too broad and perhaps not truly where my interests lie. At this point
I threw myself into our group projects, where I and my group exceled in
research and discussions. I started to lose sight of my individual topic and
felt it almost a chore to work on. This immediately set off alarm bells in my
head, once again I abandoned my topic and dabbled here there in various topics
including some diary like posts that talked about the world I see in school, a
couple of flat out confusion/change rants about the woes of being a teenager,
and just update posts as I wanted to just keep moving forward even if I was
moving forward confusedly. This is when I sort asked myself do I really know
what my true passion is and what could spend all my time doing? It was made
clear that this class should be used as a tool to research and better
understand your passion, but once it started feel like a chore, I felt as if I
wasn’t getting what I could out of the class. This is where I seriously started
to notice my slacking off demeanor.
As I continued
(and still continue) to struggle with my individual topic, I tried (and still
am trying) to keep my blog a true ‘digital diary’ of all the issues that have sprung
upon me throughout this semester. My blog is a semi-accurate representation of
what I have done over semester. While, it shows the backbone of what I have, where I have tripped up, and how I
attempted to change, it isn’t a full body
of work it could have been. However, throughout this process, I have learned to
break down problems logically; to evaluate, test and trial, and offer a
solution. On multiple occasions I have I found myself using the techniques I
used to solve the problems I encountered in my individual pursuit in other
classrooms and other aspects of life. While don’t believe I can, honestly,
justify success with my individual topic, I can justify success with my growth
as a critical thinker. I believe that I have effectively demonstrated my newly
gained knowledge in multiple real life situations.
Much of my
growth as a critical thinker is in result of help from my teachers. Many of
their suggestions and critiques have come to positive results that have gained
me the knowledge I have now. However, on few occasions there have been
announcements of assignments or projects or systems that would be place in
order to help us better understand our topics, gain more structure, and work
better together that were implemented. I believe it truly help us as a class to
have some of those suggested assignments and such to allow for more structure
such a as reading another like we read Outliers, or even more scheduled
assignments.
Furthermore,
this class has taught me to think outside the box, and figure out ways to
rationally break down and solve problems. Again, I cannot say my independent
study was successful, but I did gain a lot as an intellect. This class has
helped me see where quite few of my weaknesses lay, such as my lack of self-drive.
This class requires a certain level of self-drive I believe I have not
developed yet. This class has helped me gain a significant amount self-drive;
however, has shown me I still do need a class with more structure and focus. For
future, I will use the principles I gained class to push my thought process one
step further as a critical thinker should. This semester I would say that
collectively, with all my successes and failures and discoveries I have
achieved what I wanted to, and gained additional experience that will serve me
well later in life. All in all, I believe this semester is the textbook example
how a successful life will be, a collective mix of successes, failures, and
discoveries.
